Substitute Mother's Touch

“Lisa, uh… could I ask a favor of you?” Darren’s voice was strained, laced with a desperation that cut through the sterile hospital air. The fluorescent lights of the pediatric unit cast a harsh glow on his face, highlighting the dark circles under his eyes and the tremor in his hands as he nervously tugged at his meticulously trimmed beard and mustache. He’d been avoiding eye contact with anyone since the accident, lost in a haze of grief and guilt. Lisa, a nurse part-time, had offered her condolences, but she’d sensed a deeper pain lurking beneath his carefully constructed facade. Now, he was leaning heavily on her, seeking solace in a place where she could truly understand.

“Sure, Darren. What can I do?” Lisa replied, her own heart aching for him. She made one last notation in her chart, a small act of kindness amidst the chaos of her shift, before turning to face him fully. She’d known Darren for a few years, ever since he’d started bringing in his daughter, Allie, for regular checkups. The little girl, all of four years old, had lost her mother in a tragic car accident, and Darren had been devastated. Lisa had offered her help during the funeral, a small gesture of support amidst the overwhelming sorrow. But it was the sobbing cries of Allie, clinging to her father’s leg and repeatedly asking if her mommy was coming home, that had truly broken her heart. The memory of that tiny, heartbroken child still haunted her, a stark reminder of the fragility of life and the enduring power of love.

“Um… can we talk somewhere else?” Darren asked, his voice barely a whisper. He glanced nervously at the clock on the wall, a silent plea for privacy. “Sure–want a coffee?” Lisa suggested, hoping to diffuse the tension. They found a small, secluded alcove near the break room, the aroma of stale coffee a welcome distraction from the sterile environment. As they sat across from each other, the warmth of the mug warming her hands, Darren’s nervousness intensified.

“Lisa, could you help me… with Allie?” he finally blurted out, his eyes pleading for understanding. The words hung in the air, heavy with unspoken emotion. Lisa took a deep breath, her mind racing through the memories of the past year. It had been over a year since the accident, and Darren was still struggling to cope with the loss of his wife and daughter. The pediatric unit had been filled with condolences, but no one had truly grasped the depth of his grief. He’d been so utterly consumed by his sorrow that he'd found solace in her assistance, a small measure of comfort in a world that had turned upside down. She’d done her best to comfort the tender little soul, repeatedly reassuring her that her mommy was watching over her, a futile attempt to ease the child's pain. The image of Allie’s tear-streaked face, her small hand clutching a worn teddy bear, was burned into her memory. It was a scene she couldn't erase, a constant reminder of the devastating consequences of loss.

“How is she?” Lisa asked gently, her voice soft and reassuring. “She… she’s fine… Uh, Okay,” Darren replied ruefully, avoiding her gaze. “What is she… four now?” Lisa confirmed, her heart heavy with sympathy. “Yeah. As of two—no, make that five months ago. I was wondering if you… if you have time that is… if you could take care of her for the week I’m gone at that Chicago class?” Darren’s request hung in the air, a desperate plea for help. Lisa couldn't deny her feelings. Her best friend, Marie, knew of her inability to have children, but Darren didn’t, and had no idea the gift he was giving her to pretend to be a mom for a week.

“Well, sure, I can do that,” she said, a genuine smile spreading across her face. It wasn't just a job; it was a chance to fill a void in her own life, to experience the joy of motherhood, even if only for a brief period. “You will? The whole week?” Darren asked, his voice filled with hope. “Sure, I’d be glad to!” Lisa confirmed, her heart pounding with excitement. “Good gosh, Lisa—that’s awful nice of—I mean, we’re a long ways away from your home though. And Allie’s in pre-school, is that, uh…” Lisa pondered for a moment, considering the logistics of the situation. “I suppose I could just stay at your home, if that made things easier. That way she’d be near all her stuff and wouldn’t have to pack or anything.” Darren’s relief was palpable. “You’d do that for me?” he asked, his eyes shining with gratitude. “For Allie, not for you,” she teased, winking at him. “No, it shouldn’t be a problem. I’ll check with my husband, but I don’t think he’ll mind.” She almost grinned, already imagining the playful arguments she’d have with her husband about her temporary role as a mother. She knew he wouldn’t refuse her – he never did, but he’d undoubtedly proclaim that he’d likely starve before she got back, would die from lack of affection (a.k.a. sex) while she was gone, that the house would turn into a pigsty, etc.

“Wow—that would be so nice! I’ve been pulling my hair out wondering what to do. And it will be great—I know she remembers you.” Darren said, his voice filled with genuine appreciation. The days crawled by as they waited for the time to come. Then, finally, the day arrived. With one last good-natured grumble from her husband, Lisa packed her bags and hopped into the car, ready to embark on her temporary motherhood adventure. Looking out the window, she could see Darren smiling at her, a mixture of sadness and excitement in his eyes. They’d always enjoyed teasing each other, but in this moment, it felt different – it was a silent acknowledgment of the shared responsibility they were taking on. They loved to tease one another, but truth be told, he was happy for her. It was small consolation, being a mom for a day (or a week in this case), but she adored children, and the week would bring her a lot of joy.

Meeting Darren at the door as he made his exit to head for the airport, her eyes lit up to see Allie again. At the moment she was squeezing her father for all she was worth, her little brow furrowed with exertion. Nope, once again her daddy was too big to squish! Then she was practically on a dead run to the one that would take care of her for the week. “Hi Weesa!” Lisa exclaimed, her heart swelling with warmth. Lisa smiled brightly, her heart pounding with delight to receive a child in her arms. Allie still couldn’t say her “L’s,” but they could work on that, couldn’t they?

“Thanks again, Lisa—this means a lot to me.” Darren said, his voice thick with emotion. He didn’t immediately respond, and he looked at her with admiration, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. It wasn’t that long ago and his own sweetheart was standing right in that spot where… He pushed away the thought. He suddenly realized that Lisa was the first woman other than a relative that had even been in his house since his wife. Beautiful, too—inside and out. Catching her grin and telltale wink, he picked up his bags and headed out the door to his car. He’d tried to scrub the house from top to bottom, but she’d no doubt be able to tell it was now a “guy’s” house, the last remnants of his wife’s feminine touch having faded over time. Pulling out of the driveway, he saw them both again waving to him from the front window. He returned their wave, but felt pursued by the tears that streamed unbidden down his cheeks as he drove away.

Unfortunately for both ladies concerned, the ‘little’ one and the ‘big’ one, pre-school came first. With a flurry of activity, Lisa got little Allie off to school before zipping into work herself. She’d made a special arrangement with her supervisor to work shorter shifts, and the time didn’t seem to go fast enough before she could head back out to pick up her little charge.

She managed to make it just in time, too, coming near the school entrance just as Allie practically bounded from the school, her oversize backpack in tow. Feeling the ‘mist’ in her eyes as she listened to the happy chatter of a little girl recount her morning in meticulous detail, she brushed away a tear. It wouldn’t do for Allie to have to worry about that, to know just how cathartic her adorable little voice happened to be.

Unlike the morning, the afternoon seemed to pass as a single heart beat. Allie informed her that she was a big girl now and didn’t need to take a nap. So it was only right that they went to town to do some ‘big girl’ things, like getting their nails done. ‘Pink bubble-gum sparkles’ was how she described the color she wanted, much to the amusement of the spa staff. It frankly wasn’t Lisa’s first choice, and neither was the matching chap-stick that came with it, but she played along, both of them coming home with ‘pink bubble-gum sparkles.’ She’d explain it to her husband later. Then it was off to the grocery store before returning home in time to make supper, where Allie again described the important parts of her day in between bites of blueberry pancakes.

It took Lisa nearly half an hour to leave her bedside after tucking Allie in. Allie had long since entered dreamland, her soft breathing one of the few sounds in the room. Lisa had read her a bedtime story, and she could almost still hear Allie’s excited voice as she added colorful commentary to the story, instructing her how to read the story “Jus’ like Daddy.” She could still feel the warmth of Allie’s enormous hug as she tucked her into bed. Then Allie inquired about her father, and Lisa had reassured her that he’d be coming home soon. There was something marvelous about the innocence of a child, and Lisa was thankful again for the opportunity, even if it was a lot of work. But her heart also felt a pang for her husband. Softly closing the door to Allie’s room, she wished he was here to simply hold her in his arms. No wonder it had been so hard for Darren!

Moving quietly to the bedroom, she stood in the doorway and appraised the bed. Just an ordinary bed like any other, but she wondered how long ago there had been happiness here, where two souls in love had created a beautiful little girl. She’d made a few alterations to make it more comfortable for a child, adding a plush rug and a nightlight. She’d made a few alterations to make it more comfortable for a child, adding a plush rug and a nightlight. Thinking for a moment, she suggested, “I suppose I could just stay at your home, if that made things easier. That way she’d be near all her stuff and wouldn’t have to pack or anything.” Darren’s relief was palpable. “You’d do that for me?” he asked, his eyes shining with gratitude. “For Allie, not for you,” she teased, winking at him. “No, it shouldn’t be a problem. I’ll check with my husband, but I don’t think he’ll mind.” She almost grinned, already imagining the playful arguments she’d have with her husband about her temporary role as a mother. She knew he wouldn’t refuse her – he never did, but he’d undoubtedly proclaim that he’d likely starve before she got back, would die from lack of affection (a.k.a. sex) while she was gone, that the house would turn into a pigsty, etc.

“Wow—that would be so nice! I’ve been pulling my hair out wondering what to do. And it will be great—I know she remembers you.” Darren said, his voice filled with genuine appreciation. It was small consolation, being a mom for a day (or a week in this case), but she adored children, and the week would bring her a lot of joy. She closed her eyes, savoring the moment, letting the warmth of her husband’s love wash over her. And then, she thought, there was just one more thing she needed to do. She rose from the bed, her movements slow and deliberate, and walked towards the closet. Reaching inside, she pulled out a small, velvet box. Opening it, she revealed a miniature teddy bear, its fur the same shade of pink as Allie’s nails. It was a perfect replica of the one she’d seen Allie clutching in her father’s arms. She smiled, her heart overflowing with tenderness, and placed the teddy bear on the pillow next to Allie’s head. It was a small gesture, but it would surely bring a smile to the little girl’s face. As she turned to leave the room, she heard a soft voice whisper, “Thank you.” And in that moment, Lisa knew that she had not only filled a void in her own life, but had also helped to heal a broken heart.

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Substitute Mother's Touch

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